You know you're drunk when...

Posted on Aug. 19, 2008 at 3:31 p.m. Posted by Fonz

Feel free to add to it...

  1. your pee last longer than 2 and a half minutes.
  2. your buds are trying to cock block you, yet have no intention of hooking up with your "hot" woman
  3. you throw up all over your Mom's bed because the blacklight posters on your wall are scaring you.
  4. youre laying on the side of the road in a bush in the middle of the night, calling your friends, and the only thing that will come out of your mouth is, "I'm in hell!"
  5. youre not horny at all, you know your dick wont work, but you are still trying your ass of to get laid.
  6. you cant even stand up straight on two legs, but youre willing to skateboard 20 blocks to the nearest jack in the crack
  7. the hickups dont hurt anymore...
  8. your knees start giving out uncontrollably
  9. somebody else points out to you that youre bleeding terribly and you have no idea how it happened.


Comments

  • On Sept. 1, 2008 at 12:39 p.m. gregg said

    it seems like it is a good idea to try and run through the walls in your house

    Karate Chopping glass bottles with your hands causes no pain, even when the glass is still sticking in your hands....

  • On Aug. 20, 2008 at 4:29 p.m. Drew said

    ...the 2-for-1 packs of cigs you bought earlier that night have all been smoked.
    ...unprompted slaps to the face become a regular part of the conversation between friends.
    ...you get kicked out of a medieval-themed dinner show for throwing food at people you deemed unspirited and yelling "Dude, you're better than that!"
    ...bro-mance trumps romance.
    ...you're out of beer and you start drinking random "wounded soldiers" around the kitchen, not knowing that one of them is filled with the spit from your buddy who chews tobacco.
    ...you start pop-locking.
    ...Guitar Hero isn't as easy as you'd thought it'd be.

  • On Aug. 19, 2008 at 8:08 p.m. Singer said

    1. A mixed drink consisting of bacardi 151, fruit punch, an otter pop, and 2 pieces of bologne seem like it may just be ok....

    2. You buy the last 20 pieces of pizza and let the rest of the 25 people in line starve....

    3. Even though you are so drunk you are stumbling, drooling, and half passed out, you think that one more shot sounds like a good idea.

    4. Drinking the super secret mix of 10 different alcohols mixed together is a great idea.

    5. Not having enough room in the cab you called to get home, so you volunteer to lie down in the trunk with someone else....and they light up a cigarette......

  • On Aug. 19, 2008 at 7:42 p.m. Singer said

    7 out of 9.......Wow, I am some kind of Hero....

    And those posters were terrifying.




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